MR. PRESIDENT, I'M HEADED TO MEXICO

A friend sent this forward to me and though I normally delete every forward that comes my way, I thought this one was worth passing along.

I sure wish someone we've elected could come up with a solution to this problem that doesn't involve rewarding those who break the law or that would increase the tax burden of actual American citizens.

Ok, here it is -

Dear President Bush:

I'm about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family and I would like to ask you to assist me. I'm going to walk across the border from the US into Mexico and I need to make a few arrangements. I know you can help with this. I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws. I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do here.

So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way over? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.

2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need, whether I use them or not.

3. All government forms need to be printed in English.

4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.

5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.

6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.

7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.

8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.

9. I do not plan to have any car insurance and I won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.

10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from Pres. Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all police officers speak English.

11. I plan to fly the US flag from my house top, put flag decals on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any complaints or negative comments from the locals.

12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes and don't enforce any labor laws or tax laws.

13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice and never say a critical word about me or about the strain I might place on the economy.

I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for all the people who come to the US from Mexico. I am sure that Pres. Fox won't mind returning the favor if you ask himnicely. However, if he gives you any trouble, just invite him to go quail hunting with your VP.

Thank you so much for your kind help.